Happy Father's Day

Truth be told, my dad wasn't much of a dad. He had a horrible drinking problem that eventually lead to him having liver and stomach cancer. To be honest, I rarely remember him not having a Labatt's Blue or a Bacardi and Coke in his hand at night. He would drink himself to oblivion as long as I can remember. I honestly don't want that to be the main memory that is etched in my mind of him but it is what it is.

That being said, I do have grace for him. God gave him grace and I decided to do the same. However, I needed some information for that to happen. So I got into this deep conversation with my mom about him. I wanted to know why he drank so much. She told me that my older sister Hae Joo died when she was three. He happened to be in Germany at the time of her death. My grandmother had taken Hae Joo and got her cremated and then subsequently burned every picture of her. All remnants of her existence was burned and my dad came back from Germany and was unable to get any closure.

Every Father's Day, I get teary-eyed when I think about my dad and the relationship that could have been. I often watch "Frequency" which I think is one of the best Father's Day movies ever made and I wish I had more time with him. That grace that God extended to my dad; I have done the same. Frankly, it feels good to do that. It's kind of like tying up loose ends before the surgery. I trust everyone had a great Father's Day and I hope that if your father isn't the best dad in the world that at least you will extend him some grace.